I’ve been on a fair share of airplanes in my life and I have also met a fair share of people on airplanes. Some were very nice people, but some where annoying as F****CKKKK! (excuse the language). Let me introduce you to five of these people, and hope that this will be your only encounter with them 😀
1.The Guy who always needs to pee.
This person has a bladder the size of a free perfume sample from Sephora. He has to pee so. dam. often. Doesn’t sound too bad does it? Nah, it’s fine. Until you are sitting next to the aisle and that dude is at the window and every five minutes is pee-pee time. The whole plane stares at you while you clumsily try to get up, spilling the airplane food (whatever that was supposed to be) on your lap. Wait two minutes and repeat the whole process of getting up (banging you head this time.) Whan you finally think you have peace, it happens again. (Really dude?!? You haven’t even had anything to drink since the last time!
2. Daddy Long Legs
AHHH yes, the beloved 12 hour flights (note the sarcasm). WEll maybe you can at least catch a few ZZZ s if you recline your seat. Ummmm, the seat isn’t budging? Oh yes, it seems you have encountered the passenger I like to call Daddy Long Legs. His knees reach all the way to the back of your seat. Hmpf. It’s not really his fault, of course, but it should be illegal for people with long legs not to book the extra leg room option. Who’s with me?
3. The Weird Sleeper
Is there a hole in the roof of the plane? No? Oh, they why is your shoulder wet? Oh, nevermind, it’s just drool from the weird sleeper, no big deal. Or wait, big deal, huge deal, A STRANGER just drooled on your shoulder. SOmehow this person manages to sleep in the most uncomfortable positions. I’m talking like legs crossed on seat, head on table and hands on headrest in front. Or if you are lucky, on you shoulder. If you get the super-deluxe package, the person not only sleeps on your shoulder, but also snores into your ear. How about a nap now?
4. The Musician
You know those people who used to be in you class in school, that always drummed their pencils on their desks? Well, its high school all over again. Except worse. This person listens to music, as one does while travelling. But it’s so loud. Isn’t the point of headphones that only you can hear the music, and to save the others from noise? Because that sure as heck isn’t working. But the worst is yet to come. You can blend the music out…kinda. The music-listener seems to be totally oblivious to that and starts drumming on the table. Um excuse me dude, but your rhythm is not as on point as you think it is! Sincerely, everyone.
5. The two-year Old
It’s not even a metaphor. I mean a two.year old. Little kids are lovely creature, but on airplanes, they turn into the spawn of satan.
Soo that was it from me this week, I hope you liked it and never have to encounter these people. If you have anything to add to this list, please do.